Parlo Italiano

Gradually bit by bit I am learning to use my Italian in more then just selective groups of words. I am beginning to learn to put together my own sentences. All with the help of my verbs. Up until know I never considered verbs to be so important, but that might partly be because I never considered words such as am, and have and are as verbs before. Anyway I will show you what I can now write all on my own.

Ho una sorella, due madre e uno papa. Una Madre ha due figli, una figlia e uno figlio. Non mia sorella e fratello. Mio papa e una madre vivere in americano. Mia nonna paterna e chiamata Marge e mia sorella Lisa. Il nostro cognome e Simpson.

If you translate that you will read I have a pope. this is due to the fact that daddy in Italian has an accent over the last a. I don't have accents for my letter a's. Also there a lots of and's interchange them with is where it makes sense an e with an accent is an is and an e without is an and. Oh an figli can mean kids, doesn't have to be just sons.

An out of class sentence for your amusement.

Togliti i pantaloni. Voglio succhi il tuo pene.

Beware the resturant that drops the n. You want penne pasta not pene.

Avete quanto necessario per diventare il numero uno?

I've been thinking for a while that there are times when it is kind of required that you have 'special' people in your life for specific rolls in your life from this point in my life on. People to witness signatures, people to sign registries, people to organize my will after I die and people to be 'god'parents to my potential children. At the moment I dunno who I would put in those roles. So I thought I would create a form for you to fill in and let me know why you should have a special role in my future.

Your Details

Name:
Sex: M F Yes

Quality of Friendship

Length of time you knew I existed:
Quantity of years as friends:

Personal Argument

Reason you think you should be given high ranking positions in my future life in 25 words or less:
Enter your 25 words here

Che e il loro papa?

Lets play who is their daddy? I would like you to meet my 4 children
The Twins -Dominique and Conrad (aka Con&Dom), Peter the IV and Powerfat.

Dom likes picking Daisy's and playing The Sims 3.
Con likes his tricycle and wants to be a computer programmer.

Peter the IV loves to swim and paint his brothers teddy pink.
and
Powerfat likes to play wow and watch cartoons. When he grows up he wants to be a ninja just like Naruto.

The question I put towards you is who are their daddies?
Due to the marvellous technology provided by face book, Powerfat and Peter the IV where birthed by their fathers.

Sciopero!

That is it! I am going on Strike!

I am not going to do anymore then the bare minimumn until the program I implimented to make everybodies lives a little easier by showing the all the information in the same place, (an not exceptionally unique idea) and also keep track of all the orders is being used. Orders are constantly coming through that do not have their information there and people expect me to find the details that they know in their heads.

I am tired of tracking down emails that have the shipping address on it which could have been copy and pasted straight in. I am tired of searching the white pages for companies that aren't in there, because you didn't spell it right in the first place. Or trying to remember what person a sample is supposed to go to when I don't talk to your customer and not done anything for your customer in anyway shape or form and thus will never be able to remember because it is not to be found in my head!

Your Chinese I am sure you understands this one, "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink" If you don't start drinking I am going to pull your head under and hold you there till you drown! In main I made this program to make my life a whole lot easier but over all it should make every bodies a whole lot easier because we won't be losing clients and you can stop blaming me because an order was incorrect. Are you afraid people will discover how incompetent you are?!?! I already know and your no smarter then the rest of them! So whilst I would fire you, they won't so you will keep your job.

I realize your all a bunch of lazy arses and the idea of entering data on a client is a pain, but if you do it this once you can send stuff to the client as many times as you want after that and guess what; you don't have to enter any more details, unless there are changes like they moved address, then it a tiny adjustment.

Also Why can't you remember your ABC's?!?!? You learnt them in preschool! Easy as ABC, 123 and Do Ra Me! All the little tabs in your folders that say the alphabet letters on them, you don't have to be a genius to figure that if it says A you put all the company's that start with A behind that tab, same for the B's and so on!

An while we are at it STOP LEAVING YOUR QUOTES ON MY DESK! If you put your quote in the program I wouldn't need to see it for a start. 2 it ends up on my desk for months and months with no home no owner and is just a big giant pain! I WILL THROW THEM OUT!

Lastly, I might be the receptionist by title but I am so much smarter then you, so stop blaming me when things go wrong! Else next time you stuff up your computer I am not going to help you! An if you continue to whine (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!) I am going to slap you and tell you what I think of you and that is "Go get a computer class, computers have advanced since 1982. You now work for a small company thus we don't have the money for big out of house created programs. Pull your head out your arse and learn to use other programs other then outlook and stop complaining that the program isn't working, it's not working because your an idiot. You are lucky to have me and I am only learning computers in a serious way, but I have a long fuse and excellent temper and I WILL TAKE IT OUT ON YOU!"

Attention All Cooks!

May I introduce to you the new age of computer technology in the kitchen!

Ok so it isn't actually in existence but dude this is going to be the best thing ever!


Close your eyes and imagine your nice clean tidy kitchen, the world of your ultimate yummiest creations. The room in the house that sustains lives! Now imagine a little thin lcd screen type box on your wall that cooks your meals!

Now open your eyes, are you interested or even slightly curious, what is this marvel?

Actually I hate to put a small pin in that marvellous dream, you'll still have to do the hard work, but this box will make it so much easier. Welcome to the NGK (Nerd Geek's Kitchen) and her newest toy the 'CookBook20,000'!

It consists of waterproof, heatproof, touch screen containing all your recipes. You can plan your weekly menu's in advance, get an accurate shopping list, contain a calendar of household activities and adjust the recipes to only make the required amount. Also tells you when to start cooking the veggies and/or other accompaniments so that everything finishes at the right times. It will keep a list of specific household members likes an dislikes ingredients or dishes. It can give you vegan, gluten free or vegitarian dishes at the press of a button for those more fussy guests. Cooking will be a breeze.

It will have voice activation, so you can say next and get the next step in the recipe while your up to your eyeballs in instant porridge. Small inbuilt printer to print out that shopping list for you to take to the shops. Wireless internet connection, to download new recipes other then those it came with (recipes on it will come from who ever endorses the product (Please please please Woman's Weekly)) Think Itunes for cooking!. A 'laser' keyboard is inbuilt into the base to light up the bench below to enter those secret family recipes handed down through the family.

Say good bye to the accidental spillage on your cookbook rendering the book totally destroyed and unusable. Say goodbye to searching for hours for the page that you like that fell out of the book. Say good bye to the beetroot stains that make a 6 cups look a lot like 8 cups.

I need feed back on this goldmine of an idea! Your input please!

Please note this is my idea an I will sue if you steal my idea!

My Library

If you glance down on the right hand side, there is a large green box (not the one that says Italian help) filled with books and a link to 'My Library'. I realise I am being very forward and presumptuous but if you follow that link you can view a wish list (along with all the books I own eventually) for all the books movies games computer software that I want. Should you ever be stumped for a present to give me.

Materiale Ragazza

Likely I should have posted this post of interest Monday week ago anyway, due to certain circumstances I have discovered I am not woman of material possessions. I have possessions but I am not desperatly attached to them.

The past few days I have been talking to cops and insurance people, because my car got broken into and I lost my GPS (Simon I miss you) and a very expensive bracelett.

Presently it looks like I will get replacements, or cash for both items, but I did not know this when the event occoured. I had no emotive reaction to it at all, except for don't tell mum about the bracellett. I knew I was up for a lot of money when I replaced it all (my claim is for $2000 you can see how much my bracellett was worth)), but I wasn't distressed about it.

Explains why I'd love to just pack the things I wanna keep (ie books, computer and bed (actually that is about it) and just leave all the other shite I 've surrounded myself behind an start from scratch.

Il problema dei traduttori

As you know I have a slight fascination with learning Italian. I go to Italiano Scuola (Italian School) every Thursday(Giovedì) night. I am learning, an likely I can speak better Italian then I can write, and as long as I can remember the Italiano sounds and not the English I can read it pretty well, even if I got no clue what it means. So sometimes I find myself wanting to write Italiano messages, or cheating on my homework and I find myself back at the google translators. The more I learn the bigger I want my sentences to be and the broader the topics. It is gradually working less and less.

I wrote:
I thought I would write an tell you a naughty story. I want to put you across my knee your cock between my knees, and spank you hard with my hand on your bare bum.

The translator returned:
Pensavo che scrivere un raccontare una storia maliziose. Voglio metterti in tutta la mia ginocchio il tuo cazzo tra le mie ginocchia, e si spank duro con la mia mano sul tuo culo nudo.

Translated back to English:
I thought that writing a tell a story naughty. I want to get across my knee your cock between my knees, and spank hard with my hand on your ass naked.

By the end I not sure what is happening any more... I know what is happening, but I don't know enough Italian to make sure it is right with out translating in an out. Admittedly I am sure the story could have been amusing, an erotic short story with a heavy accent and terrible gramma

Narnia - principe Caspian

I am counting down the days to the start of Narnia's Prince Caspian. I love the Narnia stories and the first movie has finally achieved my expectations for how it should be produced. One story I won't have to produce myself one day.

Makeover in Progres

Putting my learning into practice... maybe... be back soon

Money Sucks Eggs!

Huston we have a problem

It is not fair... totally totally not fair. The Sims is advancing and I don't have all the expansion packs yet!

THE SIMS 3
is here and I am not ready!

Wedding Presents

Occasionally I chance to dream, on last night was just one occasion.

Last night I dreamed I was getting married. Not such a big deal, except that Richard Branson was giving me an my fiancée his Virgin Mobile Phone Company for a wedding present. Not a store which to sell them from.. but the whole entire company!

Was very very nice present... except neither me or the fiancée knew anything about running the company. He wouldn't take no for an answer an just started giving us an idea of where things were at an what we had to do... which by the way was pretty much nothing.

Anyway I woke up, pity... would have been lots of money...

Thanks for all the fish

My recent article in the edge has created quite a commotion in my family. I won't tell you how horrid cruel and vindicitve my family is; apparently that is me.

So if you have positive friendly comments on reading it feel free to comment about it to me. If not send my sister a consolidatory sms/e-mail.

if you do the latter please don't return here.

.xhtml

I have decided that getting full marks in me xhtml homework is an impossibility. My last lot of homework had me really in a tis. I had everything written right; but the table (the homework was on tables) was not doing what it should. I even had my favourite tutor working on it with me. Finally we got it to work, and doing what it should. We validated an made sure all tabs where closed an all apostrophe's in. it validated so I handed it in.

I got it back last night, I only got a 9 out of 10. An I still not sure how I lost the marks. There were 2 comments on the page. 1 was be consistent I'd written ="3" which was fine... but right next to it I had written ="5px" (they both mean the same thing with or without the px) the other said align.. 'insert more'... is not a style, I knew that, but it was only doing what I needed it to do when it was a style. Did I mention these 2 comments are over 3 pages. Both comments were on one page, an if a page is worth 3.333333...(recurring) a whole mark is really really a lot to loose.

Maybe she dosn't like me because I don't listen to her 'teachering' in class. I don't want to sit for an hour bored out of my brain when I could be coding my class work, and my homework an get out before 9. I don't want to have to listen to 'I don't know all the time'... I swear it is like her favourite statement. I wanna pass the course (preferably with a high distinction) get my piece of paper, move and get a job that pays better then this one

Luci, macchina fotografica, azione

You know I been thinking.... I would like to start a tv series. no I don't watch one; I mean make it. Not that I am a particularly big advocate for sevi tv, but I would really like to have a tv series on there. I want to be director/writer, I already know they story it would tell I've wanted to see it on a screen for many many years... an it would kinda be like home and away meets little house on the praire. An whilst i know that there would be likely legal matters involved and lots of money, I want to do it... problem is, I don't have a camera (other then the one on my mobile (which isn't really the sort of thing you want for this)) and I don't have a crew, or a cast... in fact no experience in lots of what would be required.

It would be a regular program geared more to the early teen, with a spiritual message. But with a lot of focus on making the program as good as regular tv as possible....


*sigh*

Critter County

Someone has wreaked my childhood. I realised to day that despite my over bearing imagination my childhood has vanished! I'm only 25 where could it have gone? Someone must of stolen it!.

In my trying to remember the books I own for my library I remebered books I used to read as a child (that I don't have anymore). One such book which has ever since disappointed me was a Critter County book, Pretty sure it was the 'Words can hurt' book. There were other critter county books but this one has dissapointed me ever since when I have lost something.

Critter county was a little book about talking animals. Sydney the Squirrel was the main character and he always solved the problem. This story was about the kids going to the sports store and how a baseball glove went missing and the lion got blamed. An lion said he hadn't taken it. So Sydney went back to the store and found the glove in a corner leaning on a de di di da star. An everyone got in trouble for saying unkind things to the lion.

Anyway, I ever since I have always been so positive that every lost item is resting on a de di di da star (possibly more then one picture book encouraged this) and ever since I have been disappointed because when ever I find my lost things there are no de di di da stars...

I want a de di di da star.

Biblioteca

I started a library record today. It isn't what I want, but it will do for now until I get a proper library data base (aka linux and Koho). You can view it if you like, Here, if you like. there isn't very much there atm, I am at work so it is only what I can remember. Lots more should get added over time. I have lots and lots of books, and dvd's for that matter. I do loan, but they are loans I want them back so I very careful about it as I have had to replace books that weren't returned.

Volete sposare me

I watched Gilmore Girls last night. In fact it was the last one I have. The last few minutes of the episode had Logan asking Lorilie's permission to marry Rori. (If you don't know the characters it doesn't matter for this post, just note boy asks mum to marry daughter).

Now normally I am an old fashioned sort of girl; but I would seriously consider turning down the guy that asked me if he got my mothers permission first (or my sisters). I don't know why but the idea of them saying sure go ahead an worse knowing about it before me appals me. I am not my mothers subject, an I really don't have the best of relationship with her anyway.

My mother (an my sister I fear) believe it is their right to be asked. They also believe it is their right to be heavily involved in my wedding, that it is their right the wedding be held in their area, their right to be in the bridal party (mostly sister here). They also seem to think they will have free rights to my children. I can't say that these to people have ruined my life, but I can say they haven't made it the most pleasant journey thus far, and I don't want them heavily involved in my death do we part relationship. Asking their permission is like opening the door waving a white flag and begging them to be involved.

I am not asking for them to be completely cut out of my life, sadly it isn't even possible (though it would be nice sometimes). Just I would really like them to be hindered and shown the boundries, an I would almost consider it an act of traitorship, for the potential husband to ask permission, he'd be undermining the boundaries I want to set. You can always loosen firm boundaries, it is much harder to tighten them up later.

There are 2 wonderful reason to moove 1000 k's from home; 1. the object of my affection is there (most important), 2. My 'parents' can't turn up unannounced.

Accendere la luce

All week the lights on the street at school have been turned off. On Monday I figured it was a one off, but as I not a big fan of walking in the dark, and walking past an small empty park a public pool and down the side of a railway track where there are lots of cars but is mostly disertated, having little light to see by doesn't make a lone female feel most comfortable about the situation.

It isn't a power issue as all the stores have their lights on, an I doubt for that many lights to be off that it isn't blown light bulbs (and if it is when the council office is on this road also, it is disgusting they should get something done about it).

Monday I called Sparky while I walked, less creepy talking to Sparky when walking in these situations. Tuesday, Sparky was up to his eyeballs in work an I was not parked to far away so I braved the dark alone. Last night I was little cockier and walked just smsing back an forward.

Still I think the street should be re lit asap. Just because a police station is also on the opposite side of the street does not make it any safer for me. They have their lights on so They probably can't see the oppisite side of the street if something was to happen.